Monday, November 08, 2004

Chair Love

When I moved out of the folks house I didn't really have too much in the way of furniture. Somehow I managed to find college roommates that came with couches, chairs, keg shells, etc. It was all very convenient in college because all I ever had to move was my bed, a desk, a dresser, and a mini-fridge that served as one very good beer fridge. But once you decide to move out on your own and you realize you have nothing except for a bed, and a desk, you also realize that this apartment just got a lot more expensive. And then, the way I see it anyways, you have three options. You can find whatever hand-me down stuff you can, you can buy new and shiny stuff, or you can say "Screw it, my friends are sitting on the floor." Well, I chose the second option. Living with the folks gave me some extra dough and I thought I would invest it on some furniture.

Specifically, a leather recliner. The most AWESOME leather recliner that is so COMFORTABLE and lets you take the BEST naps and feels so COOL on a hot day. I'm a little in love with the chair, okay? And this chair came with all these months of no payments, which was a very nice thing for it to do. So month after month went by and a bill never came. And then a few more months went by. Then one month a bill did come, but it was for a pair of slacks that I bought for work at the same department store where I purchased my girlfriend, the leather recliner. So I responsibly paid off the slacks, never noticing that the bill for the precious chair was behind it. Then the next month another bill came, which I thought was odd because I had not purchased anything from the department store in the past month. And on this bill there was a late payment fee. The hell? So I go back to the previous bill and sure enough, they included the chair bill in a way that made it look like the second page of the slacks bill. Who even looks at the second page of a bill? So I freak out some because I hate late payments and am convinced my credit rating is shot to hell, and I decide I need to call the hotline and cleverly work my way out of the late fee. I decide I just need to play really stupid. This is pretty much how the call went:

Me: I just got a bill for my leather recliner and it has a late charge on it. I never got the first bill.
Customer Service Lady: Did you receive any type of bill last month?
Me: A bill for a pair of pants.
CSL: Did you look on the second page? There was a separate bill for the chair.
Me: [Thinking: Holy CRAP! She's onto me.] A separate bill? Behind the other bill?
CSL: Yes.
Me: You're saying there was a second bill. Behind the first. Made to look like the second page of the first bill.
CSL: Yes.
Me: Hmm...that seems a little confusing.
CSL: Not really, if you would look through the entire thing.
Me: Right. Well, maybe that is what happened. I guess I should really look from now on.
CSL: That would be helpful.
Me: Then I wouldn't get late charges. I hate late charges. Don't you wish they would just disappear?
CSL: .......
Me: Cause I would have paid it on time. I promise that I would have. I'm even going to pay it in full now.
CSL: .........
Me: [Thinking: Good God she's going to make me come out and ask it.] So, about that late charge....
CSL: ........
Me: Can we do anything about that?
CSL: It's gone. Goodbye.

She completely called me on the oblivious act, but I did get the late charge removed from my bill and my permanent credit history. So clearly, advantage Me.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I wish I was cute to phone people. I wish my credit was good.
Sounds like it was all worth really is a nice couch.

November 10, 2004 at 6:00 PM  

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